No more I hated the destiny of that rain drop.

First rain of the season – eagerly we all have been waiting for this.
And when it started drizzling, tiny raindrops were soothing me.

but the ground was still dry –

I saw some raindrops touching my hand and some drops falling directly on the ground

And I traced one drop – but it got lost

Least bothered I continued playing with the drops on my hand
Giving it all possible shapes.

I got drenched till core
Later that day, when I was in my room –
Suddenly the idea of that lost raindrop hit me
I couldn’t digest the devil ground just gulping so many drops.
We are also like rain, some of us fall of flowers where they look beautiful
Some on dry sand – where they are born to quench the thirst of desert.
Some get lost in the endless ocean 

It definitely won’t mind being fallen in the desert.
May be many more like that drop can make desert and people around happy.
No more I hated the destiny of that raindrop.
No more was it a destitute.
It was born to die like others,
But it was born with a purpose.

Post is for a person with whom I have spent just a little but quality amount of time

This Post is for a person with whom I have spent just a little but quality amount of time.
This Post is for a person who does not reply my SMSs and Scraps.
This Post is for a person who survives on Papaya and long walks.
This Post is for a person who is the most Bold and influential person I have seen in my life.
This Post is for sexy, lovable, arrogant girl whom I miss beyond words.
This Post is for a person for a person who some how resembles my perception of life.
This Post is for a person who has understood me without uttering a word.
This Post is for a person who never consoled when she saw me crying ,but accepted me as I am.
This Post is for a person whom I miss a lot when I am alone
This Post is for a person whom I have to return a book named ' Broken Wings'
This Post is for a person who is sweetheart and a darling for me
Donno when and how but Sakina I want for meet you yar,
I luv u babes
be the way you are
I simply adore admire and love you
And ya if you visit this blog do call me or at least post your comment

Nothing lasts forever

I don’t know where life is leading to
I just want a cause to live
I just want a reason to live
I have somehow lost interest in everything
Nothing keeps me busy
Infact I don’t have anything to be busy
Is sounds very cribbing but life seriously looks dull and boring
No excitement
No fun
No work
I don’t know where it is heading too
But I am simply not feeling happy
May be this is another hibernation period
Where u simply end up being on receiving end
Nothing lasts forever

I am simply living in exile

My soul was crying
I knew nothing will change
Damage and loss has been done for a life time
My heart broke
No peace left
No dreams left
No desires left
No aims
No faith
No Ups
No downs

I am simply living in exile
Far away from the world of mine

If I doubt my dreams - I doubt my faith in god

9th Jan 2007

Yesterday I was reading “The monk who sold his Ferrari” for the 2nd time.
I remember last time when I read it .I read it as a story book
This time I am trying to read it the way writer has written it.
I mean the way writer wanted it to be read by us.

Sometimes I fear
I fear of many things
I fear of some commitments
I fear of some pressures
I fear of some expectation
I fear of my own soul

While going through the book
I realized god wants us to dream
He also helps us to follow them
We just need to listen to our inner consciousness
We just need to listen to our heart
If you think you are escaping
You are escaping from whom?
Your inner conciseness will always know it.
Right

Gita says” karam kar fal ke chinta mat kar”.
(Put yourself completely into work and never bother about the results (the fruits) of your actions)
Don’t you feel, all our chintas (fears - frustrations - expectations) start here from the expectations
Infact all our sorrows start here

It will be easy to say “deprive urself from the fruit”
But difficult to implement
Can’t we atleast try to achieve so?

Live with satisfaction and not in chaos.

I seriously felt good after reading the book
I feel God has already made plans for me
If he has already helped me to make decisions then I simply need to follow him

If I doubt my dreams
I doubt my faith in god


“The universe always helps us fight our dreams .N o matter how foolish they are “
…. By the river piadra I sat and cried
“When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true".
….. Alchemist

7th Feb 12.50

7th Feb 12.50

I reached office at 918 errrrrrrrr 915(manipulation)
Since then the only thing which I am doing dedicatedly is time pass
I read some blogs and posted some posts in my blog

I am waiting for my project partner
He seems LITTLE late today
I am supposed to design a document today
I had forgotten it, but just now my PL reminded me

I am simply waiting for the day to end as I want to go home and sleep so that I can get up early tomorrow to reach office on time

In my heart I simply thank that book seller for suggesting me alchemist

I started reading long time ago
Mostly in 6th std
The first book I read wad “Heddy”
The second book I read was “Alice in wonderland”
The 3rd book I read was “A train to Pakistan” in 7th std
I didn’t understand any thing in the book even after trying hard with dictionary

I left the book in-between as I was punished for issuing such a book from library

My librarian gave me a big lecture and good beating when he came to know that I was reading that book

I gave up reading for some time – not because of beating but something else excited me
Hmmmmm Writing
I started writing by a small and funny Hindi poem
I have misplaced all my old poems and really feel bad for that

I started with diaries
Write and tear up


In between I read something easy going
“Tale of two cities”
“David Copperfield”
“Oliver twist”
“Charismas carol”

I found all of them Kiddi books – I mean story books

I again picked up reading something interesting in 9/10th std
This time I started with
“Range of angles”
Then “the man who divided Indian”

From 9th to 2nd year of engg
I gulped down every book which I came across
I read whole “Sidney Sheldon “collection

Name it and I have read it

I adored some of his books but some where nothing more than shit
Still in all his books
The life of lonely women was always presented beautifully
“If tomorrow comes”
“Wind mills of god”
“Sand of time”
“Range of angles “
“Tell me ur dreams”
“Love story”
“Painted house “


I loved all of them
I remember 1 quote from his book where the character says” I know he exploits me – but pain staying with him is less than pain of staying alone”

Then one day the bookseller from where I used to buy books said
Madam aaj kal sabh yahi padte hai
And forced me to buy Alchemist

“I started with alchemist followed by
Veronica decided to die
Memoirs of geisha
11 minutes
Zahir
5th mountain
Kite runner
Monk who sold his Ferrari
Broken wings
Lajja
Who will cry when u die
City of joy
Who will cry when u die
By the river piadra, I sat and cried
“

In my heart I simply thank that book seller for suggesting me alchemist (which I not liked much) but that book forced me to explore world of good books

Samara Revisited

Samara Revisited

Long long time ago
Not that long though

I was adamant on something
Hmm it was a movie

I revisited that movie
Again and again in my mind
Both – before and after release.

I felt a LIFE and a TRUTH in the movie
Life – about a common man
Truth – about the god, faith

We visit temples
But we never visit hearts
Hearts – of people around you

We ask for blessings
We never ask for forgiveness

We love people
But we never love ourselves

We run miles
But we never stop to admire the beauty

We involve people in our lives
But we never learn to live without them

We commit mistakes
But we never dare to admit them

We worship god
But we never devote ourselves to him

maktub

Long before I was born
It was written that I will be born as girl – maktub

Long before I was born
It was written that I will be born with lots of dreams – maktub

Long before I was born
It was written that I will make some dreams come true – maktub

Long before I was born
It was written that some of my dreams will be unfulfilled – maktub

Long before I was born
It was written that I will die a death which I don’t know – maktub

Is there anything like destiny or everything is maktub

U too need a heart to understand

I may look thoughtful, But I am not
I am simply gazing

I may look confident
But I am all in fears

I may seem calm and composed
But I am in complete chaos.

People say Ur eyes say it all
But u too need a heart to understand.

Cry Out Louder Like a Kid

Gradually I feel I have developed the feeling of letting things go, bad experiences, criticism, selfishness - all of them.
As a kid I remember crying endlessly because of the anger with in me against any damm thing.
Neither will I reason that out, nor will I stop crying.

My mom used to ask me
“What happened ? Are u mad?”
“Hmmmmm Nothing”
Crying endlessly without any meaningful reason would make me feel normal.
I simply assumed if I am crying “people should understand the reason themself”

I was a big fool
Still I am same
What has changed is that I have started feeling less bad; I just try to reason out thing if a person has behaved in a particular manner
I feel great when people are nice
asI always expect them NOT to be nice

But I still cry unreasonable
I don’t know but it does wonders to me
I feel great after that

People say a healthy laugh does wonders
Trust me so does a healthy cry

LIFE OF AN EMPLOYED/UNEMPLOYED SOFTWARE ENGG

LIFE OF AN EMPLOYED/UNEMPLOYED SOFTWARE ENGG
Oh Gooooooooooooood New day started

Neither was the weekend exciting nor the feeling of returning to office on Monday,
It all seemed routine. Work and holiday but look same.
Equally disgusting.

Came early, as per the company rules you are supposed to reach early. Else it is going to have impact on your bloody appraisal.

I left my home at 8.51. Realized that it is gonna be late I took a rickshaw, he was I guess unfamiliar to this area, so my drill started from he morning.

I reached office in 10 min.
Signed the so called attendance register – Today I felt like a school kid running to the classroom before his class teacher marks her absent.

Cool I have won, I reached on time
Dammmmmmmmmmmm I have won but what

Now have logged in to my machine
Checked all my office mails --- hmm nothing imp though
Checked gmail ---- seems I have many orkut scraps
Logged on to orkut --- read some scraps.
Logged out form gmail and orkut

It is just 915.

Hmmm now what should I do?
Checked my airtel bill.
Check some news stuff on rediff.

It is just 930
Now what to do till 630.

Oh Godddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd


Let me go for a Tea\Coffee